When My Kid Said “I Just Want a Normal Family”

It’s okay to not have the perfect answer.

That Moment No One Prepares You For

It came out of nowhere. One night, while cleaning up dinner dishes and thinking about tomorrow’s to-do list, my child looked up at me and said, “I just want a normal family.” And just like that, my heart cracked in half. I froze. I didn’t know what to say, and honestly, part of me wanted to run into the bathroom and cry. If you’ve ever found yourself searching for what to say when your kid wants a normal family, I’ve been there. I’m still there, sometimes.

That moment made me question everything. Am I enough? Did I fail them? Are they hurting more than they let on? All I wanted to do was pull them close and promise them a perfect life, two parents, no court dates, no rotating weekends, no financial stress. But I couldn’t promise that. I could only offer the truth: our family might not look “normal,” but it’s full of love, and that matters more than they know.

Later that night, I sat beside them and said, “I know. I wish things were easier too. But we’re still a family. You’re loved every single day, and not having two parents under one roof doesn’t change that.” I don’t know if it was the right thing to say. But it was honest. It came from love. That’s what I’ve learned to lean into, not perfection, just presence.

What to Say When Your Kid Wants a Normal Family

You tell them what they need to hear, that they’re safe, loved, and not to blame for any of it. You show them that “normal” isn’t the goal. Connection is.

If you’ve had a moment like this, you’re not alone. So many single parents carry these invisible bruises. The grief of what we wish we could give them. The guilt of always feeling like we’re coming up short. But hear this: you’re showing up. You’re doing your best. And that matters more than any textbook version of “normal.”

Where to Get Support — For You and Your Child

If this post hit close to home, you might want to explore our Mental Health & Emotional Support Resources. Whether it’s for your child or for you, help is here, and you deserve it.

And if you’re still looking for words to say in those hard moments, this piece from Stephanie M. Brinkley offers thoughtful ways to talk with kids about nontraditional families, without shame or sugarcoating.

You’re doing more than holding it together. You’re building a life, one bedtime, one hug, one hard conversation at a time.

With compassion,
Eryndor
Founder, Single Parent Bible
admin@singleparentbible.com